Find me a Contract!

If you're a free agent, tell you your agent to hurry up and find you a contract.

Because according to a Boston Globe report, of the 160 free agents, 11 are named in the Mitchell Report. The names being named could have a lot of ramifications, but one thing it won't result in is those free agents signing monster deals as if nothing ever happened.

Regardless of what the general managers are saying -- that a name on the list won't factor into their decision on whether to sign that player -- the reality of the matter is that the Mitchell Report has a great deal of significance to the future of the sport.

No one wants a tainted player, at least not for that price.

Looking over the list of free agents, there's one slam dunk to be on the list; Jose Guillen has already been implicated in separate reports. If Guillen is a slam dunk, we'll call Barry Bonds a layup.

That leaves plenty of room on Mitchell's "roster" for guys like Eric Gagne, Luis Gonzalez, Andruw Jones, and even -- gasp! -- A-Rod. I am by no means pointing fingers, I'm just saying that the next couple of weeks could be very interesting.

The bottom line here is that I expect new contracts to be deflated from what they have been in recent years, which seems appropriate given all of the steroid inflation since the early 2000s.

So if you're a free agent, and you think you're name could be on that list, I'd recommend getting a deal done as soon as possible.

For more on the Mitchell Report and current Free Agents...
11 Free Agents spoke in probe (ESPN.com)
Free Agents Rushing to Sign Deals before Mitchell Report comes out (The Brushback)
Anticipating Backlash from the Mitchell Report (All on the Field)
List of Free Agents (ESPN.com)

Giving Away Marion Jones' Medals: Tougher than you'd Think

Remember when Marion Jones admitted she was a cheater and relinquished the five medals she won in the 2000 Sydney Olympics?

You felt sort of glad for whoever finished second, right? Winning a gold by default seven years later takes away some of the thrill, of course, but at least justice is served.

Not so fast, says the International Olympic Committee.

As it turns out, Katerina Thanou -- the Greek woman in line to claim the gold medal in the 100m that seemed to be rightfully hers -- may have some drug issues of her own.

Thanou and fellow Greek runner Kostas Kenteris failed to show up for drug tests on the eve of the Athens Olympics, claimed they were injured in a motorcycle accident and eventually pulled out. Both later were suspended for two years.

No word on whether Thanou was doping in Sydney, but the IOC is taking a wait and see approach. From the tenor of its statements, it would seem they are leaning away from awarding it to Thanou.

So we know Jones is out of the running, and it looks like Thanou may have been a cheater, so who gets the gold medal? That would be Tanya Lawrence of Jamaica (on the left in the photo), unless it turns out that she was a cheater too.

And you thought the 2000 Presidential election fiasco couldn't be topped!

For more on Marion Jones and Katerina Thanou
No Automatic Upgrade for medalists (AP, via SI.com)
Jones Gives Back Five Medals (AP, via ESPN.com)

Separated at Birth: Stephen Jackson & Willem DaFoe

A reader sent this one in and my first reaction -- as yours might be -- was No Way. But take a closer look, and you'll see that Stephen Jackson (right) and Willem DaFoe (from the Spiderman series, among other things) bear a strange resemblance.

Dennis Rodman Wants a Piece of the WNBA Pie

Somehow we had to know that we hadn't heard the last from Dennis Rodman.

Word is that Rodman would like to become a head coach in the WNBA, where his team -- if he were given the reins -- "would lead the league in rebounding, have a defensive-minded identity, and we'd run the triangle offense."

Excellent. So Dennis, if you'll just sign right here and date here, we'll find you a team shortly.

The league has 14 teams, and I'm guessing most of them are pretty satisfied with their coaches. (Fun fact: Bill Laimbeer and Tree Rollins, two of Dennis Rodman's former Pistons teammates, are currently manning head coaching positions.) At least, I doubt any owner or general manager would read of Rodman's interest and immediately pick up the phone to create a vacancy just for him.

More than likely, this is just another publicity stunt by Rodman. Come to think of it, what part of his life isn't?

For more on Dennis Rodman and the WNBA
Dennis Rodman Wants Head Coach Position in WNBA (PR Newswire, via Foxsports.com)
Dennis Rodman (Wikipedia Entry -- worth skimming, at least)
Family Guy WNBA clip (Mostly unrelated, but funny Truveo video. If you love the WNBA, don't watch this.)

Congrats for our High Expectations of You

Tyler Hansbrough, Roy Hibbert, Chris Lofton, Drew Neitzel and Darren Collison belong to a very exclusive club.

Most of these NCAA basketball players will do good or even great things at the NBA level, but there is a distinct possibility that at least one will have no greater claim to fame than what he achieved without achieving anything.

Ladies and gentlemen, these are your NCAA All-Americans. Your pre-season NCAA All-Americans, as voted on by members of the Associated Press.

Seriously, is there a dumber award on the face of the planet?

Granted, these guys have given fans and sports writers every reason to believe they'll have monster seasons this year. Hansbrough was a second team All American last season, Hibbert led Georgetown to the Final Four, and Lofton averaged over 20 points per game.

But why give them an award on that basis alone?

I'm all for writers producing a "Who to Watch" list; features like that add to the excitement about the upcoming season and fill in the gaps where fans lack information. But do us a favor and save the accolades for the post season.

MVP For Sale; Who'll Win the Silent Auction?

The question of where Alex Rodriguez will sign is the hot topic in baseball these days, and Scott Boras wouldn't have it any other way.

One thing I think most of us can agree on is that with Boras as his agent, Rodriguez will go to whoever offers him the most money. If the entire city pitched in so Kansas City could offer A-Rod a $350 million deal, Boras would issue a statement about how committed the franchise is to winning.

Whether he realizes it or not, Alex Rodriguez has become a mercenary, available for auction to the highest bidder.

So with that established, the question becomes, who will break the bank?

According to Boston Globe reports, if Rodriguez had his druthers it would be the Red Sox. Who wouldn't want to be the richest player in baseball and win a World Series ring? That's why he orchestrated the trade to New York in the first place, isn't it?

But I don't think that will happen. Boston has a big enough payroll already, and the team in place doesn't need much in the way of fixing. Also, I'm not sure the Red Sox players or fans want to take center stage in the drama that is A-Rod's life.

For more on Alex Rodriguez and where he might sign...
5 Storylines to Follow this Off-Season (All on the Field)
A-Rod Won't Sign in S.F. (All on the Field)
Interesting Developments (Boston Globe)

Cast your vote!

I've got another poll running there on the right side, just under my lovely mug. Where do you think A-Rod will end up?