1. The playoffs will drag on far longer than any of us thought imaginable. The regular season is 82 games. The NBA finalists could play an additional 28 games -- 34% of the season -- before this is all over. To give that some additional context, the MLB playoffs last a maximum of 19 games for a single team, or 12% of the regular season. Tell me this isn't about money.
2. Kobe Bryant will score a gazillion points but the Lakers will still lose to the Suns in the first round. Debate all you'd like about what makes an MVP, but I'll vote for Steve Nash over Bryant 10 times out of 10.
3. Mark Cuban will throw at least one fit related to officiating and the Mavericks will not reach the NBA finals. Let me know what happens in the game, because I'm going to be watching Cuban. The Mavs should reach the Western Conference Finals, but I'd take my chances with the Suns or the Spurs.
4. The media will make a really big deal about Vince Carter and the New Jersey Nets facing Toronto. After all, it's the media's job to make a big deal about things. I just have a hard time getting excited about that matchup.
5. LeBron James will airball at least one game-winning shot attempt and the Cavs won't escape the first round. Incidentally, one of the two games I watched was Cleveland against Washington -- I think it was the second day of the season. I'm not claiming credibility on this basis, but my gut tells me (or maybe that's my double-shot, no-whip hazelnut mocha...) that James still isn't ready to carry a team.
6. And last but least, some team will win the NBA finals without my watching it, and I will somehow manage to care even less than I did last year. Basketball just isn't catching my attention the way it used to.
This could turn into a debate about the lack of true superstars or basketball icons, and if you want to, we'll talk about that. Bryant, James, Carter, Dwyane Wade and others are truly great players. But for me, they lack that certain X factor, that thing that makes me want -- even need -- to watch.
For better or worse, the playoffs are here. Do your best to enjoy them.

He's short, bald, and has a major chip on his shoulder.
